The Easter Story

Ok, not the Easter story...but My Easter Story.
A few years ago we were at my moms house around Easter time.
My mom asked me if it was ok if she took Turbo to an Easter egg hunt at her church. It was kind of funny how she asked.
I don’t attend church. I am not against church attendance per se it’s just not for me. But sometimes my family acts like I would freak out if they so much as drove Turbo by a church.
When they wanted to play a Veggie Tales video for him I got profuse promises that it would in no way endanger my son.
So when I was asked if he would like to go to the Easter egg hunt I was told there would be no religious indoctrination whatsoever.
I wasn’t scared.
I’m pretty sure it’s not like:
“OK, so first thing: We have a race where the kids balance an egg on a spoon and run 25 yards. Then we have an egg toss with an unboiled egg, then the egg hunt, then everybody gets baptised”
“Sounds good to me…wait, what was that last part?”
So I said “I don’t have a problem with it, let me see if Turbo wants to go”
I talked to him:

Me: do you want to go to the Easter egg hunt with Grandma?
Turbo: what’s an Easter egg hunt?
Me: well the adults hide a bunch of eggs outside and then the kids run around trying to find them.
Turbo: wouldn’t the eggs break?
Me: no, they use hard boiled eggs.
Turbo: oh, I don’t like hard boiled eggs.
Me: me neither. The point isn’t the eggs.
Turbo: doesn’t sound like much fun, finding something I don’t want.
Me: well it’s like a competition to see who can get the most.
Turbo: But why would I want to find the most of something I don’t even like?!
Me: You’re focusing on the wrong part,the point isn’t the eggs it’s the contest!
Turbo: but I don’t want ANY hard boiled eggs!
Me: then don’t do the damn Easter egg hunt, I don’t care!
Turbo: Fine I won’t!

Turbo skipped the Easter egg hunt.