Confessions Of A Closet Pen Geek

I like pens.
My sister likes purses.
We are the kind of people that will spend quadruple what you would spend at Target to get a nice piece.
(don't lie Christina.....Umm, Coach? hello?)
I own somewhere between $500 and $1,000 ( retail) worth of pens....I have 4.
A Mont Blanc, Waterman, Shaffer and a no name.
My workhorse is actually kind of a sleeper (the no name). It's not a name brand per se ( or "For Say"...for those of you in the inner circle of stupid inside jokes)
It's something you can get for $30 at an office supply chain.
But I have to say...it passes the test of price VS. quality with flying colors.
I own pens made of better material that write better and cause people to say, "nice pen"...but not at this price point.
It's a pen I can use every day at work, it performs admirably...yet, if I lose it, it won't break my heart.
So, the one I had fouled up and I brought it in to exchange.
When I got my new pen the kid said " you wanna test it?"
I said "Sure" and wrote something on the pad he shoved in front of me.
I proceeded to tell him that 90% of people, when testing a writing instrument, write their name.
It stands to reason. Aside from: the, a, an, it, and , as...etc. what word do you write more often than your own name?
So I get my new pen (a brushed aluminum Foray Focus) and head out the door.
As I reach the threshold I look back to see the kid turn the pad around to see what I have written:

BIG DICK DADDY FROM CINCINNATI

Pretty much everybody writes their name.