I spend a lot time simply trying to amuse Michael.

I have this thing I do that some people get...and F' the ones that don't!
OK slow down..
I like to dissect, in an erudite fashion, stupid bullshit.

For example I enjoy parsing the grammar of street slang.

I had this conversation the other day.

My friend(MF): "how was your lunch?"
Me: Da bomb!
MF: oh yeah? The bomb?
Me: no, DA bomb.
MF: there's a difference?
Me: oh yeah. Nobody says "the" bomb anymore, it's "Da"
MF: so "Da" for "the"?
Me: yep.
MF: what is the plural of that...like "these?"
Me: "dese"
MF:
Me: would you like me to use it in a sentence?
MF: yes.
Me: Do you like cds or tapes?
MF: Um..cds?
Me: how would you like to see dese nuts on your chin?!

(see...it's a crude oral sex joke?)
(also? I assure you this was an actual conversation I had while waiting for my latte to be made whilst at work)