I just thought of another funny story involving Richard

When I was 12 or 13 my Mom married my step dad. He's a great guy, I won't say a bad word about him.
BUT.
All of a sudden we go to church on Sunday morning. Which I found confusing because for the previous 13 years that was the other day that we slept in...the one right after Saturday?
It reminded me of my recollection of the first day of kindergarten. I am sure that they warned me I was going to be going to school, but in my mind it went like this:
I was rudely awakened very early in the morning, shoved into some new clothes and dumped off at school. I beat up a kid or 2 for giving my friend Brad Karoda a hard time because he was Japanese. Then I got up to go to the bathroom and was told I had to ask before I could go to the bathroom. That seemed like a breach of my constitutional right of freedom of urination and I treated it as such by going to the bathroom despite not having permission. Then my Mom picked me up.
The next day I was rudely awakened very early in the morning and I told my mom I wasn't going because I didn't much like it.
No luck.
Ok, so I went to church week after week, not much caring for it all.
Then one week my friend Richard asked me to go to his aunt Michael Anne's church. (she hated us calling her Aunt Michael Anne...she was only a couple of years older than us)
I didn't want to go to any church but he assured me it would be cool.

Aunt Michael Anne's church was housed in a warehouse in an industrial park in Anaheim.
So far so good.
The main auditorium was a sea of folding chairs. Cool.
We grab some seats towards the back, to the side, in a safety zone of other teenagers.
The preacher starts. He is yelling and screaming and Hallelujahing all over the place. I couldn't really follow the message because :
1) I'm pretty sure he was just freestyling the shit.
2) Richard and I were transfixed by a guy in his 20's that was alternating taking giant swigs from an 84 ounce mug of coffee and slamming his fist into his palm and saying "YEAH!"
Then the preacher called for "testimony"
It turns out this was a variation on glossolalia. People would randomly stand up and say stuff like:
"Yea mighty redeemer of eternal glory find my soul heretofore repentant upon mightiness of light!"
"And the glory on all high shone upon my soul in a waterfall of Godliness and truth"
Actually, it wasn't that coherent to be frank.
Then, just as I have Richard fired up enough to stand up and give his own testimony?
A guy stands up and says "Behold!"
and before he can utter another syllable? the Pastor says
"Brother! Wait until the spirit Truly Leads!"
Yeah, Richard didn't much feel like testifying after that.
Then, after the basket is passed around, and some singing happens the Pastor invites people to come up and receive the Lords Healing.
People wander up, he smacks them around and they flop on the floor for a spell.
A good time was had by all.

Richard looks at me, "you want to go get healed or get some punch and cookies?"
I opted for the punch and cookies.
Then we took Aunt Michael Anne's Pinto wagon out and
did J-turns and donuts in the parking lot for a while.

I have to say that was the most fun I ever had at church sober.