Who Peed In Your Cheerios?

I needed to take a shower.
Hopper was playing video games. I told him, "don't do anything"
I jump in the shower.
I get out...no Hopper.
I go around the house calling his name, without response.
Finally I am in the kitchen, "where the hell is that boy?"
A tiny voice comes from behind and above me "I'm up here dad"
He is on top of the refrigerator, eating cookies..naked.
Me: what are you doing up there?!
Hopper: eating cookies.
M: OK...WHY are you on my fridge naked, eating cookies?
H: well I was trying to climb up and my shorts kept catching on the counter...so I took them off...then I got up here and now I can't get down..


It's like living with a frat boy. He eats your food, dresses inappropriately, doesn't contribute monetarily, plays video games for hours on end....