When I'm President King

The minute you get labeled as a Celebutante or your name gets mashed up with another persons IE: Bennifer or Tomcat?
You are marked for death unless you redeem yourself.
If you can do something to show that you are worthy of the world knowing who you are.. or at least try...
Look, if you're Paris Hilton? and the President-King says "distinguish yourself or perish" and you say "well... I have no talent, no original ideas and there is no reason in the world why anyone should know I exist at all frankly...but I can make sure that every kid in this country has access to a Dell Inspiron at school ?
you live.
go on you merry way polluting the airwaves and Internet with your idiocy.
But if your response is
"what-ever"
well....i gotta shoot you into space.

literally.

I have a plan to end the tax system as we know it.
If you are a fuck-head celebrity? If you have the eyes of the world on you and you have riches beyond most peoples imagining and you act like an asshole?

I will shoot you into space.
We will have a live broadcast on Fox.

(for really special cases, true criminals like Senators Caught fucking underage boys?I will make it a pay per view...but at a reasonable cost..maybe $15-$20 bucks)
but the add revenue itself will be phenomenal...like Superbowl spots...maybe we'll do it quarterly I don't know...
but hey, all the drama of a NASA space launch.... with a live shot of Cher sitting in a space ship freaking out a bit? Come on!
then she's up there in the atmosphere...kinda digging the view...
and a hatch opens.... wait ...whats this?....her seat belt releases and she's sucked out of the side hatch.

THE CROWD GOES WILD!!

Bleacher seats available near the launch pad, Jumbo-Tron, commemorative cup...the works!
Look, this is a win-win
(except I'm tired of the phrase "win-win" so from now on if it's a "win-win" lets all say "everybody gets ice cream!")
We rid the planet of ungrateful asshole "celebrities" especially the ones who put out crap. And we get to have a violent crazy fucking spectacle with rockets and explosions and noise....which America LOVES..
oh I forgot to mention...right before take-off we're going to have Henry Rollins and Bad Brains doing a cover of"Kick Out The Jams" with Rollins screaming"Kick out the Jams motherfucker!" so hard he actually sweats blood.
(It'll be a different band covering a different song every time, because the President King loves an inspired cover song... but you get the idea)
this has so many benefits.
We don't have to go to other countries and invade them to make them think we are scary motherfuckers anymore.
Don't we all think the middle east is crazy based off of a few be-headings and some stupid fatwa's?
well if we take the biggest movie star in the world and shoot him into space because he's an asshole?
They will know for a fact we 'aint fuckin' around.
the ad revenue will make income taxes obsolete for all but the wealthiest Americans.
All of the assets of the deceased will be liquidated and used to repave the highways and build hospitals.
and it will be a great show.
Oh!...and Jimmie Kimmel will host, how cool is that?

everybody gets ice cream!