Civil clerks are stupid. Yeah I said it.

Here in the Springs the crime rate is low so the Police Looooove to make traffic stops.
I got a ticket because I didn't have the proper registration card in my car....but originally
I got pulled over because it "sounded like I was going pretty fast".
I tried to have an intelligent discussion about the high-revving nature of four cylinder engines and the impression of speed that may be given off by an engine being wound out to 7,000 rpm.
The cop preferred to talk about how loud my exhaust was.
At any rate I got the ticket.
A week later I got pulled over again. Why? I was following a friend to a club that I was unfamiliar with. He was speeding, I was not.
He got pulled over. I waited for him to get his ticket in a nearby parking lot and the proceeded to follow him to the club again.
The cop circled back and pulled me over.
He went for the damn Twofer!
He comes up to my window and says in an extremely suspicious voice "what are you up to?"
I didn't know how to answer the question without sounding guilty of something so I said
" May I ask why you pulled me over?" In a conspicuously polite manner.
He said "seems like somethings going on. I pull your buddy over and then there you are circling around in your car and then when he pulls out you fall right in line"
All of this was said in the manner of the DA making his closing statements to the jury.
Clearly ladies and gentlemen of the jury the defendant was"up to" something!
So I explained what we were "up to".

Evidently that was too easy so he then pointed out that one of the bulbs in my tail-lights was out.
Fair enough, thanks for the heads up. The whole thing wasn't broken mind you, only one side of my brake light lit up...so I had one light on the left and 2 on the right.
I think it miffed him when his Something Is Up theory didn't pan out so he gave me the ticket.

Fine, whatever. 2 "fix-it tickets". Big deal, go down to the courthouse and get them dismissed.
So I go down and show the clerk my stuff and she says fine it's dismissed. I then ask who do I have check out the tail light to prove it's fixed.
She can't find a fix-it ticket for the taillight and says if it's not in the system by now I'm clear.
Great.
Fast forward a month. I get a message from an officer telling me because I didn't take care of this ticket I have a warrant.
Super Great.
I call the courthouse to get this straightened out.
The clerk informs me that the first time I was at the wrong courthouse. I said "did you guys move or something?"
Turns out you can get a ticket from an officer and they have the discretion to assign it to "City" traffic court or "Municipal" traffic court.
Asinine!
(this will be a big no-no when I'm President King I can assure you)
But here is what pisses me off...the fucking clerk at the first courthouse knew I had just moved here and would therefore have no idea about this 2 court BS. I explicitly asked her about the second ticket. I even made a joke about how it's comforting to live in a city so safe that I could anticipate at least 2 tickets a month. Surely at some point someone has brought in a ticket and waved it in her face only to find out they are in the wrong courthouse. I can't possibly the only person in the history of The Springs to make this mistake, right?
Yet it never occurred to her to say "hey you might want to check with "municipal court"

friggin idiot!

Post Script : On the freeway exit that I take every night if you are third in line you are directly underneath a street lamp that I have noticed randomly turns on and off. Normally my first instinct is to think that the guy behind me has just flipped his lights off or on.
Tonight?
Jesus.
the fucking light comes on and I just about fudged my huggies. My brain screamed "they found me!"

I have to go down to the courthouse tomorrow....